Why Did You Create Sickness And Disease?
October 18th, 2008
Why did you create sickness and disease? I mean, I know that some have the theory that it is your way of having a natural population control: An outburst of epidemics like Meningitis, AIDS, Hepatitis (A,B,C,D,E,G, and any other strains that haven’t been found yet). I’m not speaking about those deadly, life threatening diseases, but in regards to the annoying cold, fever, stomach flu, etc. that leaves you miserable and stuck inside for days doped up on antibiotics, Tylenol w/Codeine, and super powered cold medicine.
Now for the first day or so, I’ll admit, it’s pretty cool not having to go to work or fold that pile of laundry sitting in the corner of your laundry room, or worry about what to cook for dinner (because now you have an excuse to blow your grocery budget and order “take out”). But after that first day or so it gets annoying. You sit up in bed and you feel like your heads going to explode, you answer the phone and everyone reacts with “OH, you sound horrible, AHH you sound like a man.” You lose your ability to smell or taste anything, all you want to eat is soup and jello…and maybe a little ice cream (thats the other bonus point of being sick, you can eat a whole pint of Ben and Jerrys by yourself and no one will look at you like “you’re better off putting that back in the freezer and going to the gym.”–They realize and feel your pain, you can only eat soup, Jello and ice cream).
Whats the point of torturing us feeble humans in this manner? If there is no intention of us dying, why do we even have to get sick. Frankly I think you should only have us get sick if you have full intentions of killing us off. If not let me have the ability to enjoy that sirloin steak my fiancee was going to grill for me last night that I completely turned him down on because I wanted a stupid bowl of soup!!!
-At Home Sick
Dear At Home Sick,
I’m about to change the name of this site to blamejeesus.net.
So far, I’ve been blamed for everything from racism to rich rappers to raindrops.
Now I’m responsible for your germ infestation, too? I use diseases as a method of population control? Who do you think I am? Hitler?
Well, I’m different from Hitler in two important ways:
1) I have vastly superior facial hair, and
2) I don’t kill people off to reduce the population.
And why is it that Satan isn’t getting the blame for these diseases? He gets credit for all the cool stuff like rock music and prostitution, but the minute somebody gets the sniffles it’s “Jesus, why are you doing this to me?!”
Can you picture me in a lab somewhere creating biological weapons and laughing like a super-villain? That’s just not the case. Diseases are a product of a vast ecosystem that contains everything from complex organisms like mammals and reptiles to tiny bacteria, viruses, and parasites. Some organisms get along with one another, but some just don’t know how to play nice.
Have you considered that occasional sickness might be God’s way of keeping people humble? Imagine how much more arrogant and egotistic you people might be if you could never get sick. Doesn’t it serve to remind you of your human limitations? It could be worse. God could just come down personally and beat the crap out of you every few days. I think you’re getting off easy with a slight fever.
And remember that most of the symptoms you experience are not caused by the disease; they’re evidence of your body’s natural defenses to fight off the disease. If your temperature rises, it’s to create an environment that’s inhospitable to germs. If your nose runs or you vomit all over your fiance’s lap, that’s your body’s way of removing harmful materials. That’s why you have to be careful what medicine you take. Many medicines on the market (antihistamines, etc.) prevent symptoms rather than attacking the disease. So you’ll think you’re getting better when you stop coughing, but it’s actually shutting down your body’s natural defenses and making you sick longer.
Also… I’m not a doctor, but… um… ice cream might not be the best thing for you if you have a cold. I’d stick to the soup. Although I know when that Chunky Monkey calls, it’s hard not to accept the charges.
Get Well Soon,
JC
P.S. Your fiance wasn’t really going to grill you a steak. He only offered cause he knew you’d be too sick to accept. That way he’d get brownie points without actually having to do anything. It’s the oldest trick in the book.
Tags: disease, sickness
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